This was going to be a not blog-worthy, just going to the movies the day after Xmas kind of deal. But NO!
So my nfM (new friend M who will get a number if ends up being a regular friend) so nfM and I make plans to see Little Fockers. Forewarned by newscasts and the Rents, I am aware of upcoming SNOW and how my impractical car (copyright:mom) can never ever ever be out in the SNOW.
So nfM and I make plans to see the super early show at a certain suburban hub that also houses a Macy's store and a Petco. Off we go and arrive at the familiar movie theater to find it not familiar at all! No normal box office and wonderful popcorn smell. We arrive to see THiS:
A cheesy, Las Vegas style BOOZE lounge (???!!!WTF???)
As we buy the tix, we are informed that this is now a full on dine-in, movie experience theater and are we willing to pay $17.50 per ticket of which $7.50 is our food credit....nfM and I are speechless, mentally reeling from this curve thrown at us so unexpectedly!!! ...er...er..say we and ask if this extra fee is for our popcorn and all. NO, this is for our in-movie dining experience. We are presented with a screen representing the theater and asked to click on our dining seats, where we must sit, like it's the fucking Cirque de Soleil or some such, instead of just a generic ass movie that we came to see. ok ok, we buy the tickets and proceed inside, noting the bizarre new carpeting that makes us feel like we are on a cruise ship (nfM confirms this, glamourized by actually having worked in spa settings on fancy ass cruise ships and spending months 'at sea'...love expression 'at sea').
We get inside what used to be the normal theater #2 but now looks like this:
Sorry for poor quality, these are taken with iPhone, but just note: this again is a vegas set up, with everyone having low lit tables and having to choose from the menu...yes, while the movie has started and then, throughout the movie!!!!
The menu consists of triple bypass specials that no one would ever order!
Our waitress comes and takes our order. It takes us an inordinate amount of time, on account of poor lighting and, more significantly, the fact that this is Jersey, and when one comes to see the movie, it is to see the movie, and to reprogram the suburban brain to now have to incorporate the 'in the diner' think track takes a major shift...The movie starts, and is funny and we try to enjoy it, but the movie waiters keep dashing back and forth with trays and repeatedly bring us other peoples orders and argue with us while blocking the movie and talking. If they are not talking to us, we still cannot hear the movie because the party in front, next to or in front of us is doing food orders or changes. Cannot believe, that during one of the funniest parts of the movie, I have the bulk of a 300lbs person with tiny tray in front of me and I am hissing 'No! No! I DID NOT order green tea!!! Latteeee...what? Latte! Yes, hot!' while twisting around to see the the screen! Anyone ready to make changes or additions to their food order can press the red button, like so:
It summons your server and GLOWS, which we can imagine makes the movie experience even better! OMG...this whole thing was just a trip to Disturbia, and it is a credit to Little Fockers that I can still recommend it, since feel that I missed half of it. Avoid the full dining movie experience!!!
I mean, seriously, WHY???? Did someone figure out that the TGIfridays across the street makes bank off after the movies crowd, so let's stuff them during the movie? If you look at the menu, it's not part of any 'making America slim effort'. Giving it a great big thumbs down DON'T!!!
Location:Jersey Hood
An idea who's time has not come. Good lord...what mental heavy weight came up with this? Anybody ordering food in front of me at a Russell Crowe movie will be wearing it home.
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